Way of the Vampire (2005)
Opis: 1885 Transylvania(?): Abraham Van Helsing [Rhett Giles] eaves his wife in the
care of Monk Sebastien [Andreas Beckett] while he and his slayers penetrate the lair of Count
Vladimir Dracula. Although Van Helsing successfully destroys Dracula, the cost
is great. The monk Sebastien is actually a vampire prince, and while Van
Helsing is out killing vampires, Sebastien turns Van Helsing's wife into one.Present day Los Angeles: Dr Abraham Van Helsing, slayer of vampires, is
laying low, working as a hematologist at University Hospital after just moving
there from Paris. Vampires have been lying low, too, drinking the cold blood of
dead animals, not hunting humans, basically starving themselves all on account
of their fear of Van Helsing. Roman [Jared Cohn] can't take it anymore. He gets
a job at University Hospital as an
orderly and steals three pints of blood from the blood bank. When Arianna [Denise Boutte],
chief vampire bitch, sees the name on the label -- Dr Abraham Van Helsing --
she begins to shiver in her black, high-heeled, lace-up boots and runs straight
to Sebastien (after taking a few swigs of the blood herself). She offers the
blood to Sebastien, who has disintegrated into a withered, sniffling, lustless
ragtag lying on a couch and talking in word salad. Arianna forces a sip of the
human blood down his throat and, after that one sip, Sebastien knows what he
must do -- unite all the vampires, feed again on humans, show them who's boss,
and kill Van Helsing. However, killing Van Helsing isn't going to be easy. After being forced
to destroy his own wife, Van Helsing turned to the Knights Templar and made a
deal with God. Until he kills the last vampire prince, Van Helsing will walk
the earth as an immortal. The only stipulation is that, should he ever drink
vampire blood, he will be turned and forever damned.The first thing Sebastien does, now that he's found purpose again, is to
drink the blood of a prostitute, banging his chest after the first few swigs
and roaring like King Kong. The next thing he does is change into black leather
pants and a new goth shirt and hold a pep rally, inspiring the vampires to come
out from the derelict, stinking, moldering buildings in which they are hiding
and rise again as hunters of human blood. As luck would have it, the prostitute
shows up at University Hospital, practically drained of blood. She is given
eight units of blood, but she's not getting any better. When nurse Emily [Brent Falco] tells
Van Helsing about the patient, he runs to her room to take a look. Right away,
Van Helsing knows that she is changing into a vampire. When no one is looking,
Van Helsing sprinkles her with holy water, smothers her with a pillow, drives a
stake through her chest, and cuts out her heart with a cast saw.Van Helsing concludes that the vampires are hunting humans again and that
it is time for him to come out of hiding and put together a team of slayers.
So, Van Helsing consults Father Cefalu [Anthony Turk], who agrees to find some young,
able-bodied, seminary students for him to train. The next morning, Van Helsing
meets seven recruits and gives them a pep talk on the art of vampire slaying.
As Van Helsing educates the recruits in the way of the vampire, nurse Emily
shows up. She explains that she works with the homeless at the parish and that
Father Cefalu asked her to come.
Suddenly a call comes in. The detective brother of one of the recruits calls to tell him about a body that was just found. It was drained of
blood and its heart was cut out. Van Helsing, Dominic [James Ashby], and another recruit head
over to the crime scene and begin their first vampire hunt. They look through a
nearby abandoned building and, sure enough, there's a coffin with a vampire in
it. Van Helsing tops the coffin with a branch of wild rose and begins firing
bullets into the coffin. On his 11th shot, the group is suddenly set upon by a
second vampire, and the fun begins.Meanwhile, Roman has learned that nurse Emily is Van Helsing's girlfriend, so he and Arianna wait in the hall for Emily to show
up. When Emily appears, Arianna has Roman bite her in the neck, then she falls
into Emily's arms begging for help. Emily takes Arianna, not to the emergency
room, but to the church where the slayers are training, also not noticing that
they're being followed by a slug of vampires. Suddenly, the vampires crash the
church and start beating up the slayers. When Van Helsing shows up holding a
cross, all the vampires disappear, taking Emily with them. Unfortunately for
Roman, he gets left behind [Roman is a bit retarded]. Van Helsing forces Roman
to reveal that the vampires have taken Emily to.an abandoned warehouse
where Sebastien is toying
with her, waiting for Van Helsing to show up. When Sebastien leaves Emily in
the care of another vampire, Emily loosens the bonds around her wrists and
suddenly springs forward, crucifix in hand. The vampire backs away, and Emily
then drinks a bottle of blessed Evian. Meanwhile, Sebastien is rallying his
vampires again. "We are vampires! Yeah! We are hunters! Yeah!" While the
vampires cheer for themselves, Van Helsing and his slayers are sneaking up on
them. Suddenly they burst into the warehouse, and it's every vampire and slayer
for himself. Van Helsing goes looking for Sebastian and Emily.Now comes the big showdown. Sebastien has changed into a bolero jacket
with red tails and cumberband. He and Van Helsing circle each other, making
small talk about the past. Off comes the Bolero jacket, revealing a white,
gauzy, long-sleeved shirt open to his waist. Van Helsing charges with stakes in
hand, but, even after all those years of living on cold rat blood, Sebastien is
definitely the better fighter. Van Helsing winds up on the ground with
Sebastien's foot on his stomach. Suddenly, Arianna takes this time to confront
Sebastien with his womanizing and let him know how much it hurts her. After
reminding Arianna who is the master, Sebastien slakes his thirst on Emily. He's
feeling pretty good about himself until he suddenly gets a tummyache and
realizes that Emily's blood contains holy Evian. Sebastien pounces on Van
Helsing anyway, but Van Helsing is able to run a stake through Sebastien's
heart. He then garrots Sebastian's head off his shoulders. Arianna gets stabbed
in the stomach but manages to get away.Now that Van Helsing has killed the last vampire prince, he prepares to
die, just as the deal was laid out. When it doesn't happen, he is puzzled. Does
it mean that God has rewarded him with the ability to live out the rest of his
life or does it mean that there is another vampire prince(ss) out there? [Original
synopsis by bj_kuehl]